Thought : Rejection is protection (?)

Rejection is protection—but that doesn’t mean it won’t hurt.

A few days ago, a friend asked me if I’d ever been rejected after confessing my feelings to someone.

The answer is both yes and no. I’ve liked someone before, but I never directly expressed how I felt. I’m the kind of person who runs away. I’ll say something like, “I like you, and I don’t think you feel the same, so let’s stop whatever this is.” In a way, I’m revealing my feelings while already pulling back. So technically, I didn’t confess—I just disappeared. And unsurprisingly, the feelings weren’t mutual. We stopped talking.

(Newsflash: he later sent me a disappearing message saying he missed our friendship. When I called out the insincerity—especially since it wasn’t even a business message—he admitted he’d sent similar “heartfelt” messages to a bunch of people that day. 🤡)

So yes, I was rejected. Clearly. And I’ve rejected people too.

The thing is—it’s never pleasant.

One coping mechanism is to tell yourself that “rejection is protection.”
And while that may be true… it still hurts.

Liking someone is rare, at least for me. There are plenty of beautiful, smart people out there—but you don’t fall for everyone. I know I don’t.

I’ve never made a direct first move, but I still think I show enough. I genuinely believe men aren’t that hard to read—they usually know when you’re into them. And when they don’t feel the same? You can sense it. Even if it’s not direct, you feel the distance.
And yes, it will hurt.

But it passes. Eventually.
The crying, the crashing, the praying—it’s all part of healing.

I have deep trust issues. I bruise easily. I overthink. I cry over things that seem small.
And yet… I hide it. I don’t like showing emotions. I see it as weakness—something people can and will use against you. So I process my pain through Drake, K-dramas, and writing.

Yes, rejection might be protection. But your heart doesn’t know that. Your brain doesn’t either. Emotional pain is processed the same way as physical pain. People do die from heartbreak—so don’t dismiss what you feel.

It stings. It hurts. But you can survive it. I’ve survived it, even I thought I couldn’t.. Many have, and many more will.

Sometimes, the shame of having liked someone who didn’t like you back stops you from acknowledging your pain.
And that’s a trap.

We, especially women, write scenarios in our heads—whole stories about what could’ve been. But reality often doesn’t live up to the fantasy. So the standards lower. The dreams shrink. And what’s left? A disappointing reality we try to accept.

Maybe the person you like right now doesn’t like you back.
Okay.
But that doesn’t make you any less deserving of being loved deeply and honestly.

Feel the hurt today—but prepare for better.

Don’t settle. Don’t let loneliness trick you into staying connected to someone who doesn’t really value you. I get it—it’s hard to cut that cord. But your peace is worth more.

Worse than staying where you’re not wanted?
Settling for someone you don’t even like just because you’re hurting.

Trust me—I’ve tried.
It doesn’t work.

But I truly believe EVERYTHING will work out perfectly for me in the end. The love I want—the love I deserve—it might not come on my timeline.
Call it the universe. Call it God.
I might be hurting today, but tomorrow will be better.
And until then, I’ll let Drake speak the words I don’t know how to say.

Anyway, that was my TED Talk for the day. I’ve rambled enough.

Just remember: better things will come—but only if you allow them to.

💕